So, it’s been a busy three days.

Wednesday was all geared towards a scoring round with young Matthew and my warm up was to meet up with Iain for 9 coaching holes.

My score wasn’t really relevant for the 9 with Iain as we were working on making my swing as consistent as possible and Iain was watching my course management very carefully.

View from the 15th green up the 6th fairway. The course is looking great!

It was an absolutely gorgeous morning and the course is looking just superb as the green keeping staff are in full preparation for the Henry Cooper Junior Masters which takes place later in June.

My swing continued to be dogged by my tendency to “spin out” of my shots causing a high fade - and so it proved on the course in the afternoon to my cost…

The frustrating “nearly” round

Before going into any detail I just need to put the final few rounds of the challenge into context. to get my handicap I need three signed (witnessed) cards within the last 6 months. I already have the following three cards a 76, a 78 and a 79 all signed and ready. I shot a 75 recently but I was on my own and it doesn’t count. So, I’m looking for 76 or better really with a witness to improve my potential handicap.

…So taking a ridiculous and needless 8 by slicing my approach into all sorts of rubbish at the second wasn’t part of my master plan on Wednesday afternoon! confidence knocked I then bogeyed 3. Ironically, after that I just thought I might as well go for it and I relaxed. 7 over after 9 wasn’t great though and I have to confess that even after my nice run on the back 9, the bogey at 16 left me pretty fed up and I just lost concentration for the last two holes. I’m only human!

Then to Thursday - “The Back 9 Roller Coaster”

I felt great on Thursday. I can’t tell you why. From the time I walked onto the putting green to practice I just had a calmness about me and I felt physically relaxed. I really noticed that my putting stroke was smooth and even. My distance control on the practice green was great. This followed through to my full swing and  despite another double at 2 (a perfectly struck PW was a club too much and shot off a slope at the back of the green into some nastiness) I was striking the ball beautifully and feeling great. 3 over for the front 9 including a lovely birdie at 7 (PW to 3 feet) and this laser straight drive at 9…

A following wind certainly helped but threading the needle of those trees from the back tee to land 270 yards up hill was one to remember.

This was the approach I was then faced with - the drive was just too long! Still out came the 60 degree wedge, straight over the tree to 15 feet. Par well and truly earned here!

How hard to earn the scores - how easy it is to blow them!

The driver right stats speak for themselves at 10 and 12. At 13 I was too long with it again and had to hack out of rough at the end of the dogleg in the fairway (I just couldn’t believe I’d carried 270 INTO the wind). I was unlucky with my lie under the back lip in the bunker. C’est la vie!

Two birdies in three holes at the end including a chip in at 18 were scant consolation to me. Playing so “well” (OK that’s open to debate!) yet scoring so badly was a tough one to take. 3 doubles and 2 triples will never end well though, eh.

And so to Friday. An early start and a caddied round with my elite performance coach Peter Hudson.

A 6am meet, followed by some short game range practice and looseners with the long stuff and I was on the tee at 7.08. Despite my good prep - and in contrast to how I felt just the day before I felt like the proverbial “bag of spanners”. I felt like I had a raging hangover although I hadn’t touched a drop! It was as if I was aware of every move in every muscle in my body - but in a mechanical rather than a “mind and body as one” kind of way.

Peter was helping me with my visualisation processes and pre-shot routines and caddying me. In truth my front 9 was like trying to race a badly tuned, yet turbo charged Morris Minor round the Indy 500. I coughed and spluttered my way round with occasional flashes of excellence (chip in birdie at 8 from the sand) but general indifference.

Yet again my very poor start to the back 9 put paid to any real chance of the kind of round score I was really after and I then settled down and played steadily again - although it still felt like pulling teeth in all honesty.

So, not exactly my Sunday best: 87, 87, 84. I know I’m pushing a bit too hard and probably taking one or two too many chances to get the dream score.

Just a few days left until the challenge is up now so I’m just going to let be what will be.

Enjoy your Jubilee Weekends - I’m determined to enjoy mine!

Its been a few days since my last update.

No. I haven’t given up early - quite the opposite - but I’ve been so focussed on playing that I’ve just been too exhausted to write. Early bed every night for me!

I played very early this morning with Peter Hudson with every intention of updating this afternoon but I was absolutely exhausted after the round and have had to rest up. I feel rancid.

So you’ll have to wait until tomorrow for the full update.

I’ve 3 rounds to update on - whether they are my best or not you will have to wait and see…

The weather, it seems, has a change curve just slightly steeper than my own!

When I look at my card for yesterday I just don’t really know what to make of it!

It looks at first sight as if I’m going backwards, losing the plot - maybe I am. The truth is though that I’m not hitting the ball that badly. The GIR stat doesn’t lie and I have been having issues hitting greens - but not because I’m not putting a decent strike on the ball (most of the time).

The weather is so hot the ball is flying a mile off the club face, the fairways have become bouncy with roll and the greens are quicker than I have ever played them here. Add even a touch of breeze and I feel like anything can happen.

Truth be told when faced with a 110 - 160 yard approach I just don’t quite know which club to take. Sounds crazy as I’ve played the course more than a hundred times but it’s true. The indecision over club selection is making me tentative, I’m missing too many greens and when I do hit them I’m often 30 feet+ from the hole and I’m instantly putting pressure on my putting (which lacks confidence on the quicker greens - I’m constantly over hitting putts and over borrowing on the shorter ones)

A few examples:

Pin high on the par 5 4th in 2 into a light wind. First time ever. Two great strikes.

Through the green on the 16th with a 3/4 7 iron 155 yards. Mad.

310 Yard drive (straight!) to 40 yards of the green on the 18th - I’ve never seen anything like it!

OK the 12 and 17th I was punished for bad mistakes (an under hit 52 degree wedge left me in the sand, short and I thinned out to some horrible rough and did well to get away with 6 and I played a really loose (safe!) 5 wood off the tee on 17 into some horrible stuff, right and docked myself stroke and distance.

Off the tee (EXCEPT THE PAR 3’S, 6 AND 17!!) I was really pretty good.

I didn’t up and down enough to recover from my tentative iron play.

I came off having played a generally relaxed, free spirited round where I had struck the ball reasonably well with a horrible 87 - having just parred the tough 18th with the drive of my life!

Today I have a 9 hole warm-up / coaching session with Iain before I go for another scoring round with young Matthew.

Come on Clive, ADAPT!!

What’s with this UK spring?

Yesterday was a long, long VERY hot day. No complaints for me to have some sun but  god it was strong.

Now I check and its rain scheduled for the back end of this week?

I started early with Iain with a quick range review session just to try and get me swinging as consistently as possible. This went quite well and I felt comfortable with what I was working on.

I then retired from the searing sun for an hour to produce my last update - but then I had the real lucky break of the day. I have been struggling to find appropriate Nizels members to commit to playing rounds with me so that all my rounds are witnessed and I can get a signed cards - so it was with a pretty heavy heart that I was hanging around on the practice green hoping to join up with someone to get a witnessed round.

Then, out of nowhere popped a young lad, Matt, who told me he had just joined the club and was to be playing on his own but he was after a partner to get initial cards signed for his handicap… A match made in heaven!! He has also just finished some exams so he wants to play as much golf as possible over the next couple of weeks. Happy Days!!

So I was energised!

We went out for nine holes of practice golf first. I played OK (4 or 5 over the front 9) with the plan of then putting in a scoring round later in the afternoon.

Decent plan.

We played the back 9 first for the scoring round and I was relatively pleased with progress until another duff tee shot at 15!

The real issue with the round was the amount of golf we played in the full heat of the day though. By the time we got to play the front 9 (the back 9 for us) we were both absolutely tired out having played 18 already in the midday and early afternoon heat. So our best plans and intentions worked against us.

I still took some heart from playing uninhibited (if still occasionally careless) golf. I just really struggled for concentration during that back 9 due to fatigue.

On the plus side Matt and I will play plenty more rounds over the coming days and I’m hopeful that a score or two will come!

Come on Clive! - and my thanks to young Matt.

Friday was my birthday so just the 9 holes for me.

I chose the front 9 for the challenge and played, ironically, as well as I have done in a couple of weeks. The birdie at the first with a sizable putt holed helped.

Generally I just swung freer - probably not surprising as I was on my own again. No point in rallying witnesses for nine holes.

The sun was shining and although it was a little frustrating being on my own for 9 it felt good to be playing better in the sun on my birthday.

After my 9 holes I made my way into London for some drinks and a spot of Chinese karaoke with friends which was just what the doctor ordered. It was great to catch up and relax.

The “in” joke was was that I was 40 but I can assure you I have another year to wait for that particular landmark. My mid life crisis has obviously come early!

Saturday was Lind’s birthday so I took the day off to spend time with her and Gracie May who now has two teeth - how time flies.

So it was Sunday that I made my way back onto the course for 18 holes with my neighbour, Jason.

I was on of my most frustrating rounds as I was swinging and playing really well - but scoring poorly again. The heat was intense but made gorgeous with a light breeze. The ball was flying an absolute mile and the greens had sped up significantly which caught me out a few times to my scoring detriment. Why can’t things just stay the same?

I was slow to settle but I felt good even on the first couple of holes. It was my mid iron and longer play that let me down. I got away with nasty sliced 6 iron second at the 4th - but the same bad shot as a tee shot on 5 cost me two stroke hacking out of long rough - as did the same one again into the drink at 8.

I drove a full 300 yards with a slight following wind at 13 (to within a yard of the lake) only to carelessly over hit my approach and end up with 3 putts. My tee shot at 15 - a true and very rare complete mis-hit - left me in the long stuff lost left of the tee box and so a solid par with my second ball resulted in a 7.

I shaved well hit putts all over the course and came off wondering how I could have played as well as I had and scored so badly - but I did so I just have to take heart from striking the ball better and go again today.

The best thing about the day though was that I played without the tension and fear that has been dogging me of late. I just have to keep faith that the scores will come. My birdie was further confirmation that my short game practice and tight yardage work is paying off - a 60 degree wedge pitched to 2 yards and a safe putt felt great.

Next!

Thursday was all about preparing for a scoring round with Iain at Nizels.

I struggled to get my head together a little and had to return home for my golf shoes from 2 miles away and also left my phone at home (including GPS yardage app which I rely on). I didn’t realise I’d left this until I arrived at the club so it was too late to recover.

Thursday was also our 1st wedding anniversary so I had a few surprises to arrange!

I spent a good couple of hours on Iain’s range, warming up and practising some bunker play and mid range irons before heading to the putting green to get a feel for the pace of those too. The weather was absolutely scorching and the greens had sped up significantly.

Linds then popped in briefly for a quick anniversary drink with Gracie May and then it was off to put a score together.

My 82 was an improvement on some of my recent scores but Iain noticed immediately that I was tense and trying to “guide the ball round the course. I was.

I relaxed much more on the back 9 but I felt like the game I was playing wasn’t my own - almost like an out of body experience.

I also had a couple of favourable chunks of luck which helped the score along - even if my hash of the 18th brought it back somewhat. By that stage I wasn’t focussed on my score at all so it wasn’t nerves - I just lost concentration too early.

In the circumstances I was content with my 82.

Home then for the perfect anniversary dinner.

A very special day.

I feel like some progress was made yesterday (Wednesday)

Because of competitions at both Nizels and Chartham Park I decided to play at Poult Wood first and then get some practice in at Nizels later.

I went to Hilden first for my obligatory warm up session which was positive enough before heading in good time to the course for plenty of putting practice. The greens were plenty slower than I’m used to but generally in great shape.

I also met up with a lovely chap at the first tee - another lone golfer - and we agreed to join up for what was a very enjoyable round indeed. I had forgotten just how much I love playing in the sun (it’s been a while!!) and with light hearted easy company the round was a real pleasure and my play - especially at the first 6 holes - reflected this.

If I tell you that as well as my birdie at 3 I shaved the birdie putt at 2 and was just on the fringe of the green no more than 25 feet away from the hole with an eagle putt at 4 you’ll appreciate more that I had started well.

The club slipped in my hand for my tee shot at 7 resulting in a strong pull left and a lost ball in a pond. This really knocked my confidence a bit and although I played a decent enough recovery shot from a very tricky spot it rolled though the green for an eventual 6. This caused me to wobble for the next few holes as it knocked my confidence a little - but thought I steadied the ship quite well in the end. 

I had to leave after 16 holes as I was late for a meeting but I felt that I had finally started to see some genuine green shoots in my golf game.

I was back at Nizels at 5.30 and put in another 6 holes of practice which was enjoyable as the sting of the daytime sunshine had subsided and it was a glorious evening. I had tired a little though and my play reflected that - though playing 3 ball worst ball I still managed 4 pars.

As I write this on Thursday morning I have a scoring round lined up with Iain later on this afternoon which I’m now really looking forward to. I’m determined just to enjoy the whole experience and let the score be what it will be. It seems that’s when I play my best golf.

Bring it on!!

If such a condition exists then I’m currently suffering from it.

Where’s my flair, my creativity, my confidence when I need it most?

Where’s the inspiration to overcome the known levellers on the golf course and produce the quality of performance I know I’m capable of?

At this exact moment in time I just don’t know.

As writers sometimes suffer that complete lack of creative spark that inspires them to produce their prose, so my golfing creative juices seem to have run dry - on the course at least.

Knowing that I was set to play on Sunday I took a break on Friday before collecting the kids and I didn’t play until Sunday afternoon.

I had long conversations with Iain and Peter by phone on Friday evening to discuss my golfing malaise and both were very supportive and gave me good advice and actions to both reflect on and complete over the weekend.

I did both - but mainly I just kicked back.

I enjoyed the break from being on the course - mentally it is draining walking out there to put a score together every time you play. I certainly have a new found respect for the game’s elite who also have the pressure of supporting families  long term from their on course performance. It’s not all jazzy shirts, stay-pressed trousers and year round tans. I can imagine that for the journeyman touring pro the fear of missing a cut when the money really matters must be awful - as well as having to potentially deal with the damaged pride, dismay and helplessness of missing it.

On the plus side the hammers gained their all important promotion to the promised land of the Premier League and I had a fantastic time with friends watching and celebrating.

Then back out onto the course on Sunday evening. It was a pleasant evening, overcast but dry and warm. I was relaxed and wanting to enjoy the golf more than anything. I had asked Duncan, my friend and long time (long suffering?) playing partner, to mark the card for me to remove my scoring focus so it’s not included here but after a promising start I ended up shooting yet another 85. Generally reasonable play was yet again littered with daft mistakes and some poor putting. I seem to have an obligatory 2 or three doubles at the moment that just come from nowhere…

I practised well yesterday morning, early going through all my pitching yardages on the range. Iain then came to meet me and cast his eye over my play. He tweaked my alignment a touch, as my feet were aligned well to the right of the target. he also helped me with the scourge of my whole challenge which is my tendency to “spin out” of shots with my body during impact causing the dreaded high fade! We just worked on keeping the body “covering” the ball with the arms doing the work.

More than the technical refresher he gave me a bit of a dressing down for becoming reluctant to keep adapting and refining the swing. Before we spent time together I was keen to just keep things as they were -“I have what I have now and I need to score with it”. Having spent the time with Iain I realise I was being foolish. Review and improve does not equate to fundamental change and inconsistency. He got me hitting the ball better with just a few small tweaks.

I just have to keep the faith…

The Vice Captain PJ had agreed to play with me in the afternoon which I had been looking forward to and was ready and set for action when he arrived. A 6 at the first having been in the green side bunker for 2 took the wind out of my sails somewhat - as did 2 great shots being followed by a pitching wedge dumped into the green side bunker at 2. 6. My spirits were lifted by an outrageous chip in from 30 yards on a steep slope at the 3rd for a birdie that I had no right to hole but I do feel I’ve earned with my persistence if nothing else!!!

That fired me up somewhat and I played quite consistently in really very windy conditions indeed. The wind which caught up with me at the 8th where I clubbed up from 6 iron to hybrid with the wind fresh in the face only to see the ball bounce beyond the lake but fall back in. Gutted. I just cant write about the 9th. It was just too poor for words.

I don’t know if it was by blessing or curse but I glanced at my phone at the 10th tee to see numerous missed calls, texts and emails from Lindsay. It transpires that she had come down with a really nasty tummy bug and was struggling at home with Gracie. She needed me and quickly.

So I was either deprived or spared the back 9 - who knows? I got Gracie fed and to bed and took care of Linds for the rest of the evening.

I write this on Tuesday morning - a glorious Tuesday morning - committed to a day of baby sitting and nursing.

Maybe giving something back to Lindsay for all the support she has given me will be good for my karma and clear my cramp. I know I’d rather be playing in the sun but as I’ve learned in spades this year both what is really important in my life and that the game of golf works in very mysterious ways indeed. 

I do hope my cramp eases as black and green look so ugly on a golf card.

At this point I just can’t bring myself to write chapter and verse about yesterday’s round.

I played the back 9 first with Geoff and was happy enough with 40 and then, inexplicably, after a perfect drive at the second I launched a straightforward hybrid  second shot a full 40 yards off line into the deepest rough on the course. I felt I rallied well after that and just had an approach, again after the perfect 3w drive, dumped into the scrub by the green for a penalty and a 7!

I just need to chill out a bit more, commit and release to my shots better.

These scores are not down to technique, they are down to tension.

Today, I chill…

As a slight footnote I did commit to experimenting with the 3 wood off the tee on a few more holes with generally decent results - the one hole of interest was the straightforward 12th where I pulled my tee shot slightly left into the second cut of rough (which looked pristine off the tee as it had just been cut). In fact it took us five minutes to find the ball and then it was sitting so far down I struggled even to make contact and barely made 30 yards progress. Hitting fairways IS a must.

I was thankful that Iain was able to give me some of his time on Wednesday morning to go over my whole game.

He has not been well and wasn’t really up to spending the time with me but I think he appreciates how much I need the steer just now so we met at his old stomping ground of the East Sussex National Academy.

Iain’s jaw swelled during the morning we were together so I think he had another unwanted trip to the Hospital planned in the afternoon…

We started from the short game up:

Putting: The greens are like lightning at the course and we worked on my posture (AGAIN!) and quality of strike. Nothing more.

Chipping: Iain wanted me to show what I had been working on with the chipping and all we tweaked was to open my stance up to the target a little to promote a better turn through the stroke. I actually chipped quite nicely.

Full swing: Posture yet again - and all Iain wanted me to think about was “laying off” the club on my back swing to promote a better turn through the ball with less of the wrist hinge which has been creeping back into my swing. He also got me standing just a touch further away from the ball to give myself room to turn through better.

I didn’t start off striking the ball particularly well but I made some strong progress and was happy with my ball striking by the end of the session.

Pitching & Bunkers: He used this session to re-enforce the club being more laid off on the back swing and I saw some excellent results. I was really pleased with my bunker shots in particular as I was swinging through really nicely and landing them on a sixpence.

Iain inspired me by telling me that the very bunker we were practising in was one where the great Seve had given a bunker clinic that he was at and had holed a couple of consecutive shots in off the flag.

The Open Range at the East Sussex National

I really appreciate the effort Iain went to to see me and I hope he fully recovers soon.

I got a bit of a reminder as to how tired the challenge is making me in the afternoon. I arrived at the club at about 2pm, expecting to do 9 holes practise before some sports massage at 5. The tees were busy as was the practise green so I sat listening to the radio for 5 minutes and drifted off to sleep. It was nearly 3.30 when I woke up with a start. I NEVER daytime nap and I was disoriented all afternoon.

I did go out and practice - 6 holes of 3 ball worst ball. As well as thinking about the swing bits that Iain had left me with I used the opportunity to experiment with different driving clubs. Rob McEvoy had fed back to me that he felt I used my driver too much on the course and was unimpressed that in my next round I had used the driver on 9 holes will poor results.

I thus took 3 wood at 10 & 12 and a 5 wood to lay up at 13 with encouraging results. I drove at the same holes for comparison. In truth I had mixed results as I’ve not been hitting my 3-wood particularly well but the principle of mixing it up so as not to get too complacent on the course was sound and has given me a different perspective again.

My sports massage was not painful thankfully (I have been doing my stretching) and was a positive end to a productive - if slightly odd - day.